


A Bend in the Road

by Leandra



Category: Y tu mamá también (2001)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Friends to Lovers, Horny Teenagers, M/M, Road Trips
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-19
Updated: 2020-09-19
Packaged: 2021-03-08 01:34:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,304
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26547601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Leandra/pseuds/Leandra
Summary: On the road to life there are many paths... some twist, some turn, some dip, some curve. As long as you keep your focus, your destination is obtainable. ~ Brenda GoodJulio and Tenoch's return trip takes an unexpected turn.*-*I wrote this fic in 2003.
Relationships: Tenoch Iturbide/Julio Zapata
Comments: 7
Kudos: 22





	A Bend in the Road

**Author's Note:**

> I've always wanted to reupload this fic - I still like it, even though I wrote it 17 years ago. 
> 
> It's still buried somehwhere in the Charolastras community on LJ, I think.

The air in the car is sticky and thick with smoke and the silence hanging between them is even thicker. The car radio died a long time ago and there is nothing to distract Julio's thoughts, nothing to fill the silence. Julio wishes one of them would have the guts to speak. Silence between them has never been so uncomfortable. People say that if you can be silent in the presence of another person without feeling uncomfortable, it speaks of true friendship. But they haven’t spoken, at least not more than necessary, not since they left Luisa, Mabel and Chuy at the beach. Their friendship had always consisted of lots of talking, of jokes and stories. He longs for Tenoch to say something, to make a stupid joke so they could laugh together. Hell, he would even appreciate it if Tenoch farted just to squash the silence. 

It's late afternoon now and they have been driving for 4 hours without a stop. Julio desperately needs to take a piss, but he is reluctant to ask Tenoch to pull the car over, because that would mean speaking up and he doesn't want to be the one to break the silence. He takes out another cigarette and fumbles with the lighter, cursing when it slips from his hands and falls onto the mat between his feet. Bending forward, he searches for the lighter blindly, his hands brushing sand, the ring of a can and some coins. Finally, he pulls it out from under the seat and lights his cigarette. The smoke in his lungs calms him considerably and he just wishes the queasy feeling in his stomach would go away. It feels as if he's still hung over, or as if he had eaten something foul. He hasn't eaten since breakfast and he isn't really hungry. Maybe the nervous flutter in his guts results from an empty stomach. 

He takes a look at the backseat where the rest of their food supplies are stored. A half empty package of chips catches his attention and he grabs for it, the crunching sound when he pulls it into his lap strangely real. He digs his right hand into the foil and pulls out a handfull of smashed crisps, stuffing them into his mouth, the crumbs littering his lap and the floor. 

He catches a side-glance from Tenoch and automatically he offers the open package to him. Tenoch simply shakes his head. If there is one thing Julio knows, than it's that Tenoch would never reject food if offered. The rejection of crisps, however old, stale and smashed they may be, is a huge indication of Tenoch's mental state. He shakes his shoulders and continues staring out the window at the never-changing landscape. The heat is wavering in the distance over the dry plains, making it difficult to focus his eyes upon it. He briefly wonders if they would succeed in bringing back Betsabe tomorrow. They have driven farther than they had intended and if he doesn't get the car back to his sister tomorrow, she’ll probably drum together her revolutionary friends and kill him. At least then he wouldn’t have to deal with a closemouthed friend, or would that be ex-friend? 

The trip they had so eagerly anticipated has changed the equilibrium in their friendship and Julio has no idea how to reestablish the balance. It had all started to go downhill the moment he had seen Tenoch and Luisa. He had waited for Tenoch to bring him the shampoo, but when Tenoch didn't return immediatley, he had shut off the shower and padded on bare feet to Luisa's room to ask for the shampoo himself. Now he wishes he had stayed where he was and fuck the shampoo and his dirty hair. That was the moment it started. Telling Tenoch that he had slept with Ana wasn't a conscious decision. He only wanted to make Tenoch hurt like he had hurt when he had found them lying on the bed in a post-coital embrace. After last night, Julio isn't so sure the pain he felt then was about Luisa.

Last night. He hasn't thought about last night at all, but still it is constantly on his mind, a shadow lurking narrowly below the surface, ready to erupt and take over. Not thinking about last night is a lot like mourning, Julio thinks. You don't want to think about it, but the feeling is there and you feel miserable all the same, but deny yourself the liberation of crying. The problem is that Julio doesn't know what to feel. 

His cigarette has burnt down to his fingers and he flicks the ash off and stuffs the butt into the car's overflowing ashtray. A look at Tenoch tells him that his friend is still blankly staring at the road, mechanically driving, his body tense. Julio wants to smoothe away the tenseness, loosen the cramps in Tenoch's shoulders but he figures that if he reached out, Tenoch would flinch from his touch. No, nothing is like it used to be when they drove away from Mexico City four days ago. 

Suddenly the car slows down and Tenoch pulls over, bringing it to a screeching halt next to an assembly of trees. 

"I need to piss," he says as he pushes open the door and gets out of the drivers seat. 

Julio breathes a sigh of relief, both at the prospect of releasing his bladder and at the first words that have fallen between them for hours. He scrambles out of the passenger seat, brushing the greasy crumbs of his lap. The dry heat outside feels like a slap to his face. His bladder is so full, it hurts. Without a look back he walks several feet into the meadow, opens his zipper and releases his bladder. Would this be a normal day, Tenoch would be standing next to him, challenging him in a contest of who pissed farther, an old childish game they indulged in occasionally. But it isn't a normal day and he shakes off the last drops of urine and stuffs himself back into his trousers. 

"Do you want me to drive?" he asks, as he turns and sees Tenoch standing at the driver’s side of the car, fanning himself with his hat. 

Tenoch nods and starts to walk around the car. They brush by each other silently and only the whiff of hot air indicates Tenoch's passing by. The steering wheel is sticky and Julio wipes his own sweaty hands on his shorts before starting up the engine. Tenoch is wiping crumbs from the passenger seat, his ass lifted from the seat. 

"You can be such a pig," he remarks dryly, shooting Julio a look. A small smile plays around his lips and Julio allows himself to grin back. It feels good and Julio hopes Tenoch is going to say something else, but as soon as Tenoch has cleaned the seat, he sinks down into it, pulls his feet up and lays his hat over his face, obviously not wishing to be disturbed. 

Driving seems like a good idea to get his mind of things and Julio succumbs to his new task with undeserved enthusiasm. The road in front of him is emtpy, the silence in the car suddenly not so depressing anymore with Tenoch attempting to fall asleep in the passenger's seat. He can almost imagine that nothing happened, that it's just good old Tenoch and his pal Julio coming back from a road-trip. But something did happen, something changed and... 

Irritated, he hits the steering wheel, his sweaty hand slipping on the hot plastic a bit. Damn! Tenoch stirs a little, snuggling into a more comfortable position on his seat and Julio can't help but watch him as he turns. The cowboy hat Tenoch has laid over his face slips and slides down. Tenoch is already asleep, his dark lashes resting on his cheeks, his face slack in sleep, mouth slightly hanging open.

Julio forces his eyes back on the road in front of him. He wonders where this road will lead him. Certainly not back to the life he knew. It's the same road they're driving on, but somehow it is different. The concrete is the same, bad and jumpy like all Mexican country roads and probably all country roads in the world. It's long and mostly straight, with occasional twists and turns. Julio ponders which turn he has to take to come back to life as he knew it when he left Mexico City. 

*-*

He stops at a small town several hours later. It has grown dark and he starts to get somnolent. His eyes itch and burn from staring at the median for far too long, until the road became a blurr in front of his eyes. Tenoch stirs next to him, rubbing his eyes and sitting up. Looking out of the window, he asks, "Where are we?"

"Hell, for all I know."

Tenoch doesn't answer, but starts to roll down the window, letting in a whiff of fresh night air. It's still hot, but it's a kinder sort of hotness, one that rather cools the skin than burns it. 

"Let's find a place to crash. I don't feel like driving and I doubt you'll be willing to drive through the night."

Julio nods. He doesn't want to sleep in the backseat and a real bed sounds fantastic. He's terribly sleepy and the queer feeling in his stomach is still bothering him. Maybe they should get something real to eat as well. He pulls over at a small motel and they both climb out of the car, yawning and stretching their legs. Blood is rushing back into his feet and he winces when he puts them on the ground. 

The motel’s manager offers them a small dingy room for the night for 80 pesos. They both eat Cochinita Pibil and drink cerveza and Julio starts to feel slightly better. Conversation over dinner is non-existent, they just both stuff the pork-stew into their mouths, chewing automatically. It doesn't taste like it should, and even though Julio is sure that it actually tastes great, he can’t really cherish the food. He washes it down with the last swig of his beer and they pay for the food, still not really looking at each other. He wonders if it will be like this for the rest of the drive, if it will be like this for the rest of their lives. His friendship with Tenoch means the world to him and now it looks like it’s over, as if somebody severed the threads that bound them together. 

The room is hot, despite the closed shades and he lies down on top of the comforter of one of the narrow twin beds and stares at the ceiling. Next to him, Tenoch is pulling off his shoes and stepping out of his shorts. He can't really see him in the darkness of the room, but he can hear as Tenoch removes his pants and throws them to the floor. The bed screeches as Tenoch settles on it and then there is silence again. Julio folds his arms behind his head and continues to stare into the darkness. His body is sleepy, but his brain is awake, the thoughts he has tried to shove at the back of his mind all day coming to him unbidden. 

It's easier to think about what has transpired between them in the darkness of the room, although Tenoch's presence makes him nervous. He knows Tenoch isn't able to read his thoughts, but he's still reluctant to let his mind drift to yesterday night, as if thinking about it would transfer his thoughts through the darkness to Tenoch. The only sound in the room is Tenoch's steady, calm breathing, but it's the breathing of somebody who is awake. Julio imagines Tenoch lying on his bed only a few feet from him, curled up in a fetal position, knees drawn up to his chest, staring into the darkness like him. 

Yesterdays events are a bit hazy, blurred by too much alcohol, but still clear enough that he can't deny them. He remembers the kiss that started it all in great detail, remembers the taste of his friend and the feel of his skin, the soft pressure of Tenoch's lips on his and the first, hesitant touch of a tongue against his own. He can't remember much of the events that led to Tenoch lying on top of him. Everything is overshadowed with too much sensation, the touch of skin, the kiss that never really ended. The realness skimmed in again when Tenoch pushed his way inside him and he fell from the heights of hazy arousal into a world of pain. He remembers the shock, both of pain and realisation, like being dropped on concrete. It still hurts, he can feel the burn in his body, the abused tissues when he moves. Julio also remembers the first sparks of pleasure that suddenly shot through his body, first mingling with the stabs of pain, then overriding the ache, and his orgasm, so powerful and foreign that he bit into his arm to stifle his scream. 

When he notices his erection, it's too late to prevent it and he lies in the darkness, trying to keep his breathing down. His physical reaction confuses him even more, but he doesn't really want to think about what this means. He itches to touch himself, to release the throbbing in his cock, but not with Tenoch so close, not with him lying awake. He decides to wait until Tenoch has fallen asleep or until his erection has dissipated, but neither happens and finally, after he can't ignore the need any longer, he stands up and walks to the toilet. Resting his head against the closed door, he pushes down his shorts, a sigh of relief escaping his mouth when his hands wrap around his aching cock. Julio closes his eyes and indulges in fantasies about kissing Tenoch, about the feel of Tenoch moving above and in him. He feels dirty for reawakening images of his best friend, especially considering their current state of non-talking, but he can't help it. He spreads his legs, remembering the feeling of being full of Tenoch's cock. His hand moves fast, spreading the pre-cum from the tip of his cock over his length. He squeezes and he pulls, hard and fast like he only likes it when he does it himself. Biting his lip, he comes over his hand and slumps back against the door, the tension in his body slowly ebbing away. Relaxation sets in immediately and he sighs, then brings up his wet hand, licking across his palm. He has tasted himself before, wanting to know what Ceci tastes when she gives him head, only this time he wonders how Tenoch would taste. It's salty and bitter and he licks his hand clean, then wipes it on the inside of his t-shirt.

When he comes back into their room, Tenoch's soft snoring greets him. He stops a moment by his friend’s bed, hesitating, not sure what he is going to do. Julio wants to crawl into Tenoch's bed, wrap his limbs around his friend's sleeping form and kiss him awake with the taste of his come on his tongue. He stands there in the darkness, want and fear battling for supremacy. The fear of Tenoch's reaction wins over and he crawls back into his own bed. Despite having masturbated earlier, he's still half-hard when he finally falls asleep.

*-*

He wakes up the next morning to the sound of running water. The room is still hot, the first sunrays shining through the shades burn like fire on his face. Tenoch's bed is empty, the bedsheets rumpled. His t-shirt sticks to his back when he slowly sits up, squinting his eyes against the light of day. The door to the bathroom is ajar and from his bed he has a perfect view on Tenoch standing under the shower spray with his back to him, wet hair slicked back, the muscles in his arm twitching as he jerks off. Julio doesn't know if he is intended to see this, doesn't know if the open door is an invitation. It's not like he hasn't seen Tenoch jerking off before. They have masturbated together since they were twelve and he knows Tenoch's cock almost as well as he knows his own, although he never touched him before that night two days ago. It's not like it didn’t affect him, the image and sound of Tenoch coming, but he didn't really pay attention then, shrugged his arousal off as coming from what he was doing to himself, not from the presence of Tenoch. He's hard again and his heartbeat is throbbing in his chest like he just ran a mile, but he's also frozen to the place. 

They shared everything except the physical sensation, shared their fantasies and the retelling of their sexual adventures. He remembers the night he called Tenoch out of boredom and they talked for hours, complaining about the lack of sex in their lives and the constant horniness they both experienced. They talked about some girls and at one point, Tenoch asked him, his breathing laboured, "Are you jerking off?" Julio didn't answer, but ripped his hand from his pants, blushing furiously, caught in the act. 

"It's okay, because I'm touching myself..." Tenoch had said and then continued to tell him, what he was thinking about. It was the sound of Tenoch's moans in his ear that brought Julio off that night, but he had told himself time and again that he had come from the mutual fantasies they had shared. 

Now his raging hard-on is undeniably a result of Tenoch's actions. When Tenoch lets out a startled yelp and arches his back, Julio scrambles to his feet and runs from the room before he comes in his pants. 

An hour later, they are sitting in the car again, a heap of soft drinks and food on their backseat, Betsabe's tank filled with fuel to the hilt. It promises to be a long, hot day and Julio isn't sure if they will manage to be back in Mexico City in time. They still haven't spoken more than a few words to each other. He isn't sure if he will survive another day of silence between them. The prospect of spending the day in close proximity to Tenoch without talking is horrible and he wishes he was somewhere else. 

The minutes drag away slowly and Betsabe seems to be rooted to the spot. They pass several small villages before noon arrives and then there is nothing but the never-ending road in front of them again, dry wasteland littered with occasional bushes to each side of the road, stretching to the horizon. It's two o'clock when Betsabe suddenly jumps, the unpredicted movement followed by a loud bang and Julio steps onto the brakes with both feet. The car skitters over the road and he loses control of the steering wheel, despite gripping it hard with both hands. They come to a halt at the side of the road and he hits his head forcefully on the steering wheel. Tenoch next to him is awakened rudely from slumber when his head connects with the dashboard. 

"Fuck!", he cries, his hand coming up to rub his temple. "What the fuck was that?"

Julio tries to control his harsh breathing and manages to gasp between little pants, "Tire."

"Oh shit!" Tenoch hits the dashboard with his fist, then winces. "I can't believe it." 

They sit in stunned silence, until Tenoch finally snaps, "What are you waiting for? Get out of the car!" 

Julio nods dazedly, trying to shake a horrible feeling of foreboding from his mind. They both get out of the car to survey the damage. The left front tire is flattened and Tenoch curses, brushing his auburn hair from his face, stomping his feet as a constant stream of profanities spills from his lips. 

Julio doesn't need to look into the trunk to see that there is no car jack in there, nor a spare tire, but he is afraid to tell Tenoch that they are stranded for good. He wipes a hand over his eyes, waiting for Tenoch to find out on his own. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath to prepare himself for the moment Tenoch's anger will hit him full force. He doesn't need to wait long.

"There’s no tire."

Slowly, he opens his eyes and sees Tenoch standing in front of him, a blank look on his face.

"No," he confirms. 

One, two seconds pass, then Tenoch starts to curse again. "You moron! You fucking moron! We're stranded somewhere in the middle of nowhere with a flat tire and you didn’t bring a spare!"

Julio leans back against the scalding hot body of the car and waits for Tenoch to pull himself back together. Tenoch starts to walk up and down alongside the car, raging, gesticulating, screaming at the top of his lungs. He didn't know he missed his voice so much. It feels good to hear him talking, even if Tenoch is throwing insults at him. 

Twenty minutes later, Tenoch has talked himself hoarse and he slumps down in the shadow of the car on the concrete next to Julio's feet, banging the back of his skull against the door. Slowly, Julio slides down next to him, drawing his knees up to his chest. 

"I wish I never agreed to this trip," Tenoch mutters. "It was a fucking failure, from day one. We should have stayed at home. We could be in my father's sport club, swimming in the pool, but instead we're sitting here on a deserted road with a car maybe passing every 3 hours, with a flat tire and..."

He doesn't finish the sentence, but Julio knows what lies on the tip of Tenoch's tongue. He stares off across the plain into the distance, waiting for Tenoch to continue. 

"Everything is a mess. I'm a mess. We're a mess," Tenoch says and it sounds choked. 

Julio nods slowly, then turns to his friend. "Never thought life could be so complicated."

"No," Tenoch agrees, resting his head on his knees. He looks exhausted and resigned and Julio's arm itches, but he doesn't reach out, afraid of the energy that might break out of Tenoch, if he did so. 

Softly, Julio says, “I was thinking yesterday that if we could turn back time,.... maybe if we just drove back the same road to Mexico City, we could arrive at our starting point again, as if nothing ever happened." 

Tenoch snorts and lifts his head, turning his face towards Julio. A bitter smirk plays around his lips. 

"It will never be the same again, Julio. We fucked up. We fucked up big time."

Julio considers this for a moment, but he doesn't want to agree to Tenoch's observation. Instead he asks, "What about Ana and Ceci?"

Tenoch shakes his head. "I don't know. I don’t know anything anymore."

They are quiet for a while, each of them chasing after their own thoughts.

"The road changed...", Tenoch suddenly murmurs, his voice almost inaudible.

It's methaphorical and Julio knows that Tenoch understands him. Maybe better than Julio had thought. 

"Do you think we could go back if we wanted to?" Tenoch turns to him again, waiting for his answer. 

After a while in which Julio considers his answer thoroughly, he says, "I don't want to get back together with Ceci."

"That bitch couldn't give head anyway." 

Julio isn't sure what to say to that, but when he sees the gleam in Tenoch's eyes, he can't help but laugh and Tenoch joins in his laughter. It feels good to laugh again together and they giggle helplessly, even if it isn't really funny. Tenoch doubles over with laughter, not caring that he scrapes his elbow on the rough concrete. 

When they have pulled themselves together again, the tension between them has dissipated a bit. 

"Julio, how long until a car passes by?" 

"Hopefully soon. I don't want to sit here all afternoon listening to your complaints." 

Julio receives a shove to his guts. "Son of a bitch! I'm not complaining."

"Yes, you are."

"I'm allowed to complain. You sick fuck, you slept with my mother."

"Only once, and it wasn't that great."

"I'm not sure if I should take that as insult."

They both giggle again, but this time their laughter has a different quality to it. Julio wants to ask something else entirely, but he doesn't have the guts to change the topic. It's enough that they broke the silence between them. 

The sound of a car in the distance makes them start and they scramble to their feet simultaneously. Tenoch jumps into the middle of the road, waving his arms and Julio follows him, mimicking his actions. They both cheer when the car slows down and finally comes to a halt in front of them.

*-*

The next big town is three hours from where they leave their car and it takes another two hours to find a shop where they can buy a new tire for Betsabe. When they finally have everything they need, it's already 9 o'clock and they are both exhausted. 

They stand at the side of the road for almost an hour, but there is no car driving in their direction and finally they give up. They find a motel and rent a room for the night. It seems like they are stuck for another night on the road.

At a phone booth, Julio calls Boinas to tell her that they are not coming back tonight. Tenoch stands next to him to give him support when Boinas tweaks, but luckily Julio's sister isn't home and so he speaks to the answering machine. 

"...I'm really sorry, but it's not my fault that the car has no spare tire. We're like half a day from Mexico City and we’ll be back tomorrow afternoon, only we're stuck in this small town for tonight. I'm really sorry. See you tomorrow."

He hangs up and wipes the sweat from his forehead. Tenoch gives him a small smile. 

"She isn't going to rip your head off. It's really not your fault."

"Yeah, sure...," Julio says doubtfully.

"Let's get something to eat, Charolastra," Tenoch says and an arm comes around his shoulder. Julio closes his eyes and smiles when Tenoch uses the nickname. Together they leave the phone booth, Tenoch's hand still resting around his neck. The hand is comforting and the touch feels good. He can feel the sweat from Tenoch's arm seeping trough the fabric of his t-shirt, mingling with his own. 

Dinner is more cheerful than the day before and they spend their last money on beef, roast potatoes and beer. The conversation revolves around their plans for the rest of the summer, but neither girls nor sex come up as a topic. 

Tenoch already plans to do another road trip, this time to visit his uncle in San Jose del Cabo. It's an unspoken invitation to accompany him, and Julio's heart leaps with joy. 

"I'm going to write it all down, Julio."

Julio takes another swig of his beer, before he puts the bottle down on the table. 

"What?" he asks, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. 

"This." Tenoch makes a gesture with his hand. "Our trip."

Julio almost chokes on the beer in his mouth, then swallows convulsivley. "What?! You mean... everything?" A bit of beer spills from his mouth and he wipes it away, blushing. 

Tenoch doesn't meet his eyes but stares at the greasy table cloth, his fingers toying with the rim of his bottle.

"Yes," he says softly, then raises his head, looking Julio straight in the face. 

Julio doesn't know what he reads in Tenoch's eyes, but he realises it isn't something he has to be worried about. He reaches for his beer again, taking another sip. Drinking gives him the much needed time to process the new information. 

"What are you going to write?" His voice sounds strange to himself and he wonders if Tenoch can detect his nervousness. Probably he can. 

Tenoch shrugs. "I don't know. About Luisa. About you. About me. About our trip. About Mexico. About our friendship..." He pauses and looks at Julio, his eyes filled with concern. 

"We are friends, Charolastra, aren't we?"

Julio tries to hide the disappointement in his voice. "Yes, of course, Charolastra. We are. Always."

Tenoch rewards him with a beaming smile. "Yes." 

He lifts his bottle and holds it towards Julio. "Let's drink to our friendship."

"To friendship," Julio says, his bottle connecting with Tenoch's. 

They both take a sip, then Tenoch places his bottle on the table and stands up. Julio follows suit. He doesn't know where to put his hands, so he places them on the edge of the table. Tenoch rounds the table, stopping in front of him. Before he knows what’s happening, he finds himself crushed against Tenoch's chest, arms sliding around his waist. He slips his hands around Tenoch's back and rests his head on his friend’s shoulders, burying his burning face in Tenoch's throat. Closing his eyes, he inhales the scent of Tenoch's warm skin greedily.

Relucantly he lets go, when Tenoch steps back. They’re still too close and he can feel Tenoch's hot breath on his face. "There is just one thing that is left to be said...", Tenoch announces and Julio's stomach clenches in anticipation, his heart rate speeding up, the blood drumming loudly in his ears. 

"You DO cross your eyes when you come." 

The moment he reaches out to punch him, Tenoch takes another step back and escapes him. He is laughing, holding his stomach, stumbling backwards and Julio laughs as well as he goes after him. 

"You asshole!"

Tenoch laughs even more and turns, running away. Julio leaps after him, knocking over a chair in the process, but he doesn't care. He chases Tenoch in the narrow space between the emtpy tables, but Tenoch escapes him time and time again. It's late and most of the guests have already gone home, so nobody is there to fret about the noise they produce. 

"You take that back!" he screams and launches, his body hitting Tenoch's back with full impact and they tumble to the ground in a heap of thrashing limbs. Tenoch is still shaking with laughter and he weakly pushes himself over when Julio starts to tickle him. He knows where Tenoch is most ticklish, in his armpits and on his stomach and he lets his fingers dance over those areas mercilessly. 

"You moan like a cheap whore, Tenoch Iturbide." 

"I don't..." Tenoch protests laughing, squirming under the fingers tickling his ribs. 

"Oh yes, you do... Luisa is right, you say..."

"I... " Tenoch squirms again, his legs kicking, "... your dick isn't that ugly, Charolastra."

"You ass!" 

Exhausted, Julio stops the movement of his fingers and slumps onto Tenoch's body. The impact presses the air from Tenoch's lungs and stiffles his chuckle. Breathing hard, Julio rests his cheek on Tenoch's chest, listening to the rapid beating of Tenoch’s heart under his ear. 

A hand comes up and starts to stroke his hair hesitantly and he closes his eyes, not wanting the touch to stop, but afraid that if he turned his head, Tenoch would shy away. Still with his eyes closed, he is brave enough to ask the question that has been on his mind since they left the beach behind. 

"Does it change anything between us?" 

The hand in his hair stops its movement and he waits for Tenoch to push him away, but it doesn't happen. After a brief pause, the hand continues its stroking and Julio sighs in relief. 

"I don't know. Do you want something to change?" Tenoch murmurs quietly, almost inaudible.

He lifts his head from Tenoch's chest and looks at him. Tenoch's expression is dead-serious and Julio swallows, his mouth suddenly dry. "I don't know," he confesses. 

"What do you know, then?"

Julio's confused and he suddenly wishes they had never started this conversation. He really doesn't know anything, so he says the first thing that comes to mind. 

"That I like to kiss you." 

The words are out before he can hold them back and Tenoch struggles under him, pushing himself up. Julio's heart drops into his shoes and his first instinct is to flee, to get away from Tenoch, but he is held back and Tenoch's hands cup his face. Tenoch looks as if he is searching for something in Julio's face and then he leans in, pressing his lips to Julio’s mouth. 

Their wet lips meet in a sloppy kiss and part with a smacking sound. It isn’t romantic at all, but it feels right and Julio is way too stunned to do anything but draw in a deep shuddering breath. Then Tenoch kisses him again and he reminds himself to close his eyes this time. He slides his hands up Tenoch's arms and digs his fingernail into Tenoch’s shirt, holding on for the duration of the kiss. When they break apart again, Julio remembers that they are sitting on the dirty floor of a run-down bar and he scrambles to his feet, holding his hand out to Tenoch to pull him up as well. 

Tenoch stares at the offered hand for a moment before he takes it.

*-*

The room is quiet and dark, a batch of moonlight falling trough the gap between the curtains, casting a ray of bluish light on the comforter. Julio stands at the door, watching as Tenoch pulls up his white t-shirt, revealing skin that suddenly looks pale and delicate. He grips the hem of his own shirt and yanks it over his head unceremoniously, letting it fall to the floor at his feet, then steps towards Tenoch. Tenoch bridges the last feet between them and they stop in front of each other, breathing harshly, not touching yet. 

Finally, Tenoch lifts a hand and places it flat on Julio's chest, over his heart. The touch sends a shiver through Julio's body and he reaches out as well, his arm winding around Tenoch's shoulder, his fingers stroking on the nape of his neck lazily. There is no need to hurry. They are standing so close that their breath is mingling in the air between them. 

The kiss is slow and soft and Julio allows himself to moan when Tenoch's tongue slips past his lips, seeking out Julio’s. His hands move from Tenoch's neck down his back to the waistband of his pants and he pushes his hands inside, sliding them over smooth buttocks. Tenoch's hand has trailed down over his stomach, loosening the strings of Julio’s pants. Clothes fall away as hands explore and they both lift their legs as the garments hit their feet. Then their bodies are pressed flush together, their erections brushing between them, painting twin streaks of wetness on each other's stomachs. Tenoch steps back, pulling Julio with him until the back of his legs hit the edge of the bed and they tumble onto it. 

Tenoch's skin tastes salty and sweet at the same time and Julio licks a trail over his chest, across an erect nipple and further down to the plane of his stomach. He dips his tongue into Tenoch's navel, imagining he can still taste the sea salt there. Tenoch laughs shakily and Julio grins against Tenoch's sweaty skin, content that he has found another spot where Tenoch is ticklish. He continues tongue-fucking Tenoch's belly button until Tenoch squirms and pushes himself up, his hands coming down on Julio's head, pushing him further down. This is completely new territory and, hesitantly, Julio obliges, nipping his way down Tenoch's stomach, alongside the heavy erection, but not quite touching it. When his cheek involuntarily brushes the erect organ, Tenoch whimpers and Julio does it again, nuzzling his face into the coarse hair of Tenoch's groin, breathing in the scent of his friend's arousal. 

He knows the mechanics, but he has never done this before, so he tries to remember what he likes and he drags his tongue over the prominent vein on the underside of Tenoch's cock, enjoying it when it jumps ever so slightly and Tenoch moans. The hands are back in his hair, softly urging, and he licks across the head of the erection bumping against his lips, tasting the pre-come oozing from the slit. It doesn't taste like anything at all. Tenoch's cock looks different from his, the foreskin is cut and he thinks it looks vulnerable. Slowly he slides his mouth over the tip, careful to cover his teeth with his lips. The sensation is strange, but not wholly unpleasant. He tries to take in as much as he can, but halfway down Tenoch's cock he gags and has to draw back. 

Suddenly his respect for Ceci's blowjobs has increased. Tenoch doesn't seem to mind as he writhes under him, the hand in his hair applying soft pressure, the fingers weaving into his locks. Julio manages to draw back, a soft sound of protest flying from Tenoch's lips. He kisses his way down, licking and sucking on the hairless balls carefully. He has no idea how hard or soft he should go, so he explores the texture of the testicles slowly. He must do something right, because Tenoch pulls his knees up, his legs quivering. He licks lower, across the perineum, then dips his tongue even lower. Tenoch's body jerks, almost lifts off the bed and, surprised, he licks across that spot again. Boldly, he grasps Tenoch's legs, pushing him around until he is lying on his stomach, the round buttocks taunting him. 

Tenoch shivers as Julio smooths a hand over the round globes. He brings up his other hand and parts them, revealing the puckered muscle. Leaning in, he licks across it again and this time, Tenoch growls. The sound is encouraging and he does it again, licking a wet trail from the perineum upwards. The muscle twitches under his lips and it's Tenoch's profane curse that tells him to continue his exploration. He traces the muscle with the tip of his tongue, then experimently pushes inwards. Tenoch's constant, never-ending stream of swear-words makes him do it again and again. Only when the swearing changes to pleading does he pull back, resting his burning face on a cool cheek. He wouldn't admit it openly, but he's fascinated and a bit mindless. 

He is abruptly thrown off when Tenoch turns around, and then strong hands grip his arms forcefully and pull him up. His mouth is taken in a desperate kiss, teeth biting at his bottom lip too hard, and he groans, suddenly aware of his own, almost painful arousal. Tenoch pushes him down onto the matress, covering him with his body, his groin urgently rocking against Julio’s. Julio struggles for air and when Tenoch draws back, they are both panting. He can see Tenoch's flush even in the dimness of the room and his eyes are wide and shiny.

Neither speaks a word when Tenoch settles down next to him on his knees, an unmistakable invitation to claim, to take back what Tenoch took from him two days ago. Nervousness suddenly overcomes him and he is shaking as he draws himself up into a kneeling position and settles in between Tenoch's legs. He can't remember when he has been so afraid. This is new and frightening and nothing could have prepared him for this moment. Still, he grips Tenoch's hips and pushes forward, reminding himself to go slow as he remembers the pain he experienced. It's Tenoch who forcefully pushes himself back, impaling himself on Julio’s cock and they both cry out. Tenoch pushes himself up and suddenly Julio has his lap full of Tenoch, the sweaty back pressing against his chest, Tenoch's hair tickling his nose. He carefully draws a breath, afraid to inhale deeply. Tenoch is shaking and he slips his arms around his waist, sliding his palms over Tenoch's stomach. 

He feels his orgasm building already, the sensation is simply too intense, He doesn't dare to move. 

"I'm going to come.. I ..." he babbles into Tenoch's hair and he squints his eyes shut, biting down on his tongue, hoping the pain will stop his orgasm from happening. 

A trembling hand reaches for his own and Tenoch places their interwined fingers over his own erection. Julio sucks in a breath when Tenoch clenches his muscles and his hips thrust upwards of their own accord. 

"Yes. Do it. Fuck me."

Tenoch's plea undoes him and he rocks upward again, burying his heated face in Tenoch's hair. He's glad Tenoch can't see his eyes crossing over when he comes and he takes delight in the way Tenoch calls his name when he spills his seed into their hands. 

*-*

He wakes up hours later with a full bladder in the same position he has slumped down on the comforter after orgasm claimed him. Carefully, as not to wake Tenoch, he throws his legs over the edge of the bed and puts his feet onto the floor. He feels slightly dizzy when he gets up, but the feeling vanishes when he shakes his head. He pads to the small bathroom and squints his eyes when the neon light goes on. After he finishes, he looks at himself in the mirror. There is a goofy smile playing around his lips and he splashes cold water into his face, willing it to go away. When he comes back into the room, he can smell the heavy scent of their combined sweat and arousal in the air and he walks over to the balcony, draws the curtains and pushes the door open. The gush of fresh air is wonderful.

He goes back inside and looks for his pants. He finds them where he dropped them to the floor earlier and pulls out his cigarettes and lighter from the pocket, but doesn't dress himself. He steps out onto the balcony, lights a cigarette and looks down at the silent street. 

The night is cool and he looks up at the cloudless nightsky, thinking how the stars never change, wherever you are. They are always there, whether you are in Mexico or in Italy. He wonders briefly where Ceci is right now and if she's looking at the night sky as well, maybe thinking of him. He should feel guilty, but he doesn't. He tries to remember her face, but all he sees when he closes his eyes are Tenoch's features. It has been only a few weeks since he said goodbye to her at the airport and it has been only a week since he last masturbated thinking of her. He never thought that feelings could change so quickly, but maybe his feelings didn't change that fast after all. He's still not really sure what he feels, isn't sure if the flutter in his stomach when Tenoch looks at him can be called love. He is afraid to give this new feeling such a laden name. It was easy to say to Ceci that he loved her, because she expected to hear those words from him. He isn't sure if Tenoch wants to hear the same and he isn't sure if he wants to say them. 

Tomorrow they will go back and who knows what will happen once they have returned to Mexico City. Maybe the whole trip was one fucked-up drug-induced dream and he will forget about it - they will forget about it - once they are both back home. They broke so many of their established rules and they revealed more about themselves than they ever wanted to, more than they ever thought there was to reveal. When they are back, will Tenoch continue dating Ana? Can they go on like nothing happened, like this trip never took place? 

The soft sound of footfalls behind him alerts him to Tenoch's presence and he turns around, leaning his back against the balcony's reiling. Tenoch stands in the open door, rubbing his eyes, then he yawns and steps towards him. Wordlessly, Julio offers him a cigarette and Tenoch takes it, lighting it calmly. 

"How do you feel?" Julio asks, once Tenoch exhales the smoke and steps next to him, resting his arms on the reiling. 

"Good," comes the answer, then Tenoch shakes his head, grinning a bit. "Maybe a bit sore."

Julio can't help but chuckle and he turns, mimicking the way Tenoch leans on the balcony. He pushes against Tenoch’s elbow. "Hey..."

"Hey," Tenoch says softly. 

They finish their cigarettes in silence, but neither of them makes a move to go back inside. Finally Tenoch says, "It does change everything, you know?"

Julio nods and hmms his agreement. 

"I won’t be able to forget. Everytime I look at you, I’ll remember how you fucked me, or how you looked when I fucked you. The way you cross your eyes when you come."

"I don't."

"Yeah..." Tenoch says, but it doesn't sound like he's persuaded. 

"Do you want me to tell you that we should forget it?" Julio asks and he hates the way his voice trembles ever so slightly. "I could lie to you and tell you, that it doesn't change a damn thing for me and maybe you would feel better then."

Tenoch doesn't answer and a nauseating feeling settles in Julio's stomach as he considers the possible answers to his question. 

"No." 

Julio closes his eyes, glad when he is able to release a breath he didn't realise he was holding. 

"Maybe this whole trip wasn't about getting Luisa into the sack," Tenoch offers hesitantly, not looking at him. 

"Is this you speaking or your more mature, philosophical writer-self?"

Tenoch snorts and shakes his head. "What are you going to do when you get back?" he asks, turning to Julio for the first time since he stepped onto the balcony.

Julio shrugs. "Bring Betsabe back. Hope Boinas won't kill me. Call Ceci and tell her to go and fuck a good looking Italian." 

Tenoch laughs. "What do you think she is going to say?"

"Who? Boinas?"

Even in the darkness he can see that Tenoch rolls his eyes. "Ceci, you prick."

"Prick yourself. I don't know."

There is a brief pause until he asks, "And what about you? What are you going to do?"

"Visit my uncle. Write. Smoke a lot of weed. Prepare for lit class. And maybe call Ana and tell her to fuck Ceci."

It's Julio's turn to laugh and Tenoch joins in, shoving Julio playfully. "Wouldn't that be great... Ana and Ceci..." 

"Ana and Ceci..." Julio repeats in between gulps of air. 

"Yeah, we fuck each other and Ana and Ceci fuck each other. Circle completed."

"You're so sick and twisted."

"I'm not," Tenoch protests. "Would be the logical consequence."

Julio is still laughing when Tenoch suddenly reaches down and cups his balls. He almost chokes and the laughter dies in his throat. 

"Do you like it when I do this?" Tenoch squeezes his balls and Julio hisses when his erection springs to life. He is way too occupied with moaning to answer, so he simply nods. 

"Do you want me to do it again?" 

He nods again and is rewarded with another squeeze, his erection filling even more, jutting proudly against his stomach. 

"When we arrive at home tomorrow..." Tenoch starts, but doesn't finish the sentence, looking pointedly at Julio, who orders his brain to process the sentence.

"...we won’t be the same people..."

"...we were when we left,"‘Tenoch finishes. 

"No," Julio says. 

"No." 

The hand that cupped his balls vanishes and Tenoch turns around, stepping inside. Julio is still trying to process what has happened, his arousal not helping. 

Tenoch stops and turns his head. 

"What are you waiting for, Charolastra? I'm not going to screw you on the fucking balcony!"

Dumbstruck, Julio stares at him. "You mean it, you really mean it."

"Of course. A charolastra never breaks his word."

"Liar," Julio says, but he follows him into the room nonetheless.

*-*

They sit in the open cargo area of a small truck between wooden crates and the sun is burning mercilessly down onto them. They both have wrapped their t-shirts around their heads and Julio thinks they look like Bedouins. The airstream is no allevation and already a bright red spot of skin on Tenoch's shoulder is starting to peel. 

"Julio, are we fags?"

"What?!" The word falls from his lips accompanied by a rush of laughter. 

Tenoch doesn't laugh. He looks at Julio with a serious face, his lips not even twitching. 

"I don't know," Julio finally says. "You like to fuck girls, don't you? Let's say we're bisexual. Does it make a difference?"

"I hate America."

"You are a fag if your favorite soccer team is America," Julio quotes from the 11 commandments. 

Now Tenoch grins a bit. "Fag," he says.

"Fag yourself." 

"This truck is slow as molasses," Tenoch complains, sighing. He turns to the driver cabin and knocks on the roof. The car's body is hot and he winces when he almost burns his fist. 

"Señor, can't we go a bit faster?"

The driver shakes his head and says something says something that neither of them understands. Tenoch sighs and turns to Julio, who cocks an eyebrow.

"We would be faster if we got off and walked,” Tenoch complains.

"We would be already there if it wasn't for you being such a sleepyhead."

"Fuck you."

"You wish."

Tenoch grins, then lies back and rests his head against one of the crates, putting his arm across his eyes to protect them from the midday sun. 

"My inner clock tells me it's time for a siesta."

Julio is tempted to kick Tenoch with his foot, but he refrains from doing so and instead says, " Have your siesta, I'm going to keep watch. We can't be far from Betsabe. We have been on the road for almost four hours. It would be horrible if we missed him..."

"Good old Betsabe..." Tenoch murmurs from behind his arm. 

Julio pulls out the last cigarette from the rumpled package and lights it while he watches the road fly by. Occasionally his gaze drifts over Tenoch and he catches himself smiling when his friend murmurs something in his sleep. Half an hour later, they drive by Betsabe and he starts to drum on the truck's roof with his fists. 

"Stop! That's our car. Stop!"

Tenoch awakes, joining him immediatley. They are banging against the roof, shouting at the top of their lungs until the driver finally slows down. Julio leaps from the cargo area as soon as the car stops and Tenoch follows him a bit slower. 

"Oh thank God he's still here!"

"Did you expect that he decided to drive away on his own on a flat tire?" Tenoch murmurs, coming up beside him, his voice sounding a bit raw. The skin on his shoulder peels off in huge patches. 

With the help of the driver they manage to change the tire in no time and ten minutes later they wave the truck good bye as they both stand next to the car's wellknown body. Julio never thought he would enjoy seeing Betsabe again so much.

Tenoch complains about the stale, hot air inside the car and almost immediatley burns his hand on the steering wheel. He pulls the t-shirt from his head and wraps it around his left hand instead. Julio settles in comfortably in the passenger seat, lifts his feet onto the dashboard and draws the hat he left on the backseat yesterday over his face to shield his eyes from the sun. He falls asleep to the comforting humming of the engine and a melody Tenoch drums against the steering wheel with his palm. 

He doesn't know how long he has slept when he wakes up, but the position of the sun tells him that it's late afternoon. The landscape has changed considerably and they are passing smaller villages. In the distance he can see the smog that always hangs in the air above Mexico City. Tenoch is munching on a Gansito and when he catches Julio’s look, he holds the sweet out to him, offering him a bite. Julio shakes his head and grabs a can of soda from the backseat instead. There is a bitter taste in his mouth and he empties the can in one go, washing it away. 

"Approximately half an hour," Tenoch says just when Julio wants to ask him how long they will take. 

He nods and pulls his feet from the dashboard. A pack of cigarettes lands in his lap. "I stopped and bought some. You didn't even wake up." 

A lopsided grin appears on Tenoch's face. "I drained you last night, didn't I?"

Julio grimaces, wishing he could wipe the stupid smirk off Tenoch's face. He fumbles with the package and manages to light a cigarette, his body coordination not entirely returned from dream land. "If I had known you would turn out an even dafter prick, I wouldn’t have ever considered sleeping with you."

The grin is still there when Julio turns his head. 

"Asshole,” Tenoch says, grinning. 

Julio shoots the package of cigarettes back at Tenoch, missing him by several inches. "Charolastra," he says warmly. 

Tenoch is busy driving and Julio stares out of the window: He is more exhausted than he would admit and he wonders why coming back from a trip is always linked to a deep, physical and psychological weariness. When you start on a trip, drive away from home, the endless possibilities of the unknown lie in front of you and you’re eager to explore what lies ahead. When you return, the adventure is over, you’ve experienced everything there is and you return to the known world. Not so this time. Julio has the impression that the real adventure has just started. 

The car slows down as they find themselves at the end of a traffic jam and Tenoch sighs deeply.

“You know, there is one rule of the Charolastras’ I’m particulary fond of,” he says and turns to Julio, grinning.

“Which one? Masturbation rules?”

Tenoch snorts softly and shows him the finger. “Moron,” he says, but it sounds like an endearment, “…I was speaking of ‘Everyone can do with his ass what he wants’.”

Slowly, Julio nods. “Yeah…”

“I’m not going to let my father dictate my life,” Tenoch continues, staring blankly out the dirty front shield. He smiles and turns to Julio again. “I’m going to do what I want.”

Then Tenoch leans in and kisses him. They break apart when a car horn honks behind them urgently. The traffic jam has disintegrated. 

*-*

Julio and Tenoch sit in the car in front of Julio’s apartment building, the windows rolled down, smoking a cigarette. 

“She’s going to kill me.” 

“No, she isn’t.”

“Yes, she is.”

“Stop fretting, Julio.”

Julio takes a long drag from his cigarette and watches as the smoke rises in lazy curls in front of him. “She is going to rip my fucking head off.”

“I won’t let her do it.”

Despite his fear of stepping in front of Boinas, Julio grins. 

“I can’t let you enter the lion’s den on your own.”

“I’m glad you came.”

“We’re in this together,” Tenoch says, almost apologising. He tosses the butt of his cigarette out the window. Julio does the same. 

“Yeah, together…”

They look at each other, identical grins forming on their faces. 

“1, 2, 3…” they count down together and push the doors open.

Fin


End file.
